The anti-resolutions of 2014

I’ve been pondering over the last month whether I would set myself some goals as I have done for the past couple of years.  I’ve enjoyed this goal-setting process in the past and I’ve been fairly productive at least in part because I’ve had some ideas about the things I wanted to do in that year.  None of the goals were huge, except the tree change one of course, but they kept my motivation for things cooking, gardening or creating related.  And it was fun.

This year I’ve decided that my resolution or goal is going to be to cut myself a break and not set any, well not like I have in the past anyway.  I’m not going to beat myself up about the kids watching the TV, they do plenty of other things to balance out a bit of screen time.  I’m not going to worry if we’re eating processed flat bread (I never could get them right when I made my own), instant noodles or a tin a soup every now and again or even every week.  We always tip the scales far more towards the fresh and the home made than the processed but I can’t do it all nor do I want to become a slave to the kitchen.   There seems to be a big push towards ‘new’ ways of eating and while I admire in many ways people who can stick to these labour intensive often restrictive eating plans, whole foods, sugar free, gluten free, wheat free, grain free, low FODMAP, GAPS, superfoods etc etc, it’s not me.  I’m too skeptical about them – scratch the surface and there seems to equal numbers arguing against them or returning to regular eating because they end up feeling worse – and I don’t have the drive to follow them anyway.  I’m going to eat and feed my kids that same foods I grew up with.  Lots of fruit and vegetables, some meat (though perhaps a little less than in my own childhood), home cooked meals with some cheats in there and not feel bad about using them.

If all or some of my veggies fail or the kids pull them out before they’re ready, well so what.  I enjoy just being out in the garden with the kids (mostly) even if the harvest doesn’t live up to expectations.  I’m going to try a finish my Goodreads 2014 challenge (20 books), but it’s no big deal if I don’t.  And as for crafting or being creative, I have one project I have to finish by October, anything else is a bonus and a happy little hobby for when I find the time.

What I am going to focus on is making sure I get Miss Four to Kinder on time four days a week (some 8.30am starts in there mean I will have to be a bit more organised than I have been over the past 6 months) and not forget when I am on helper duty.  That may seem like a cop out, but I’ve become so used to slow mornings that it is going to take some changes to meet that goal.  I’m also going to put my energy into my own studies.  It’s been a long time since I was a student and never before did I have to split my time between motherhood and studying, it shall be interesting.  And I’ll be spending quite a lot of one on one time with Miss Two, something that has been rare in the past and I intend to make the most of that as well.

So whatever happens this year, I’m not going to send myself of some pointless guilt trip about how I should have done better.  It is what it is and that’s it.  The real challenge will be sticking to this, I do tend to have high expectations of myself and not feeling guilty for letting some things slide might prove difficult.

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15 Responses to The anti-resolutions of 2014

  1. narf77 says:

    Welcome back to the real world! We missed you :). I get the feeling that the media, both mainstream and social, have done nothing to make we “masses” happier with our lives. If anything, we feel like our lives are shallow husks of everyone elses perfect lives that we see/read about on a regular basis. We have gorgeous houses, perfect children, amazing yummy mummies, greenwash out the wazoo and we are left sitting in our chairs feeling completely and utterly left behind when in reality, all we are seeing is the fluffy stuff like the top of the iceberg. Social media has made it VERY easy to blur the lines between reality and “perfection” which we are led to believe, is what we should all be aiming for. What I want to know is “what happens when you get there?” No-one seems to want to answer that question and my guess is that the bar will be suruptitiously raised because attaining Nirvana doesn’t make a profit 😉

    Being “normal”. Occasionally wafting a nice biscuit at your child in order to facilitate your sanity isn’t going to kill said child and there won’t be a madding crowd arriving precisely at 7pm with torches to drag you off and make an example out of you. Life is too short to spend it feeling bad about yourself because you were unable to create everything that you ate/used/wore/ that day yourself.It is a nefariously incidious thing that in order to elevate themselves and remain hovering imperiously above the masses at a tasteful and elusive distance (“We can’t be mixing with the riff-raff DAHLING”!) many people do their level best to make their own lives appear so incredibly perfect and ordered. The reality is the complete opposite but we all fall in the trap of envying the grass on the other side of the fence without realising that the grass is invariably the same as our own.

    I love it when I read about other bloggers breaking free from the need to pursue perfection at all costs. There are entire blogging comunities surviving on on-upmanship (barely) to the detriment of real life. When we can back off from the hype we are able to see that it’s all just a massive big addiction where the winner invariably ends up anorexic, neurotic and wondering where their life went!

    • Barbara Good says:

      So, so true about social media Narf, I might just add that to my anti-resolutions – to show the warts and all of life a bit more. Thankfully I take all social media updates with a massive grain of salt and know that half the population has a laundry in utter disarray just like mine. It’s also why I post pictures of tray of burnt-to-a-crisp biscuits.

      • narf77 says:

        Ditto…same reason why I showed my “caramelised” granola recently ;). Life is full of caramelised granola and the sooner we learn to accept that and move on without having to breath into a paper bag every 5 minutes, the better our life is going to be 🙂

      • Barbara Good says:

        Hey Narf I showed off some of my reality on Facebook yesterday…. huge response! And all positive. It’s going to be a regular feature I think.

  2. Linda says:

    I grew up helping my father in the veggie garden – I know that is what your children are going to cherish very much later in life. Enjoy!

    • Barbara Good says:

      I hope so Linda. Hopefully as they get older they will continue to enjoy it and see the benefits of home grown. I’m hoping to be able to go and help Miss Four’s kindergarten re-do their veggie patch.

  3. Liz says:

    Do people really make their own flat bread?

    • fergie51 says:

      Sure do Liz, unfortunately no local store where it can be purchased and its just as easy to throw together ingredients in quicker time than driving 30klms to supermarket to find they have probably sold out! I do however stock up when I go to Dandenong Market and fill the freezer, its about a quarter of the price and much nicer than what the s/market sells too.

    • Barbara Good says:

      Apparently so Liz, but I ain’t one of them!

  4. Lorna says:

    I love the sound of your anti-resolutions, great idea. One of mine is to believe in myself more, I doubt myself and my ability for too much – I have made a start by applying for a stall at a craft fair – eeek I have never done one before.

  5. Sue says:

    How exciting, what will you be studying? I found it really hard to get my kids to kinder at that time and a nightmare to get all 3 to school on time but a few months into the year and we were all cruisy with it.

    • Barbara Good says:

      I’m starting a Masters of Education Studies Sue. I’ve been madly looking into possible research topics and am getting quite excited (and a little nervous) about it all. I hope I have the kinder drop off down pat quickly. Our first big session is tomorrow, but not until the afternoon so I think that one will be easier. It’s the early morning starts that will be interesting, we’ve been in training and we all up dressed and had breakfast by 8am this morning which is a good sign. Let’s hope we can do it when it counts. Getting three to school sounds like a nightmare, two will be hard enough I fear.

  6. Pingback: Reality Bites – Bloody Floors | The New Good Life

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